Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Paris Hilton's father, Rick, is planning a "Get out of jail" party for his eldest daughter when she's out of prison in a few weeks. He has already approached some big Las Vegas clubs, like Pure, the Hard Rock Hotel, and the Palms, none of which have signed on yet, reported Page Six. And TMZ announced "that Paris Hilton suffers from extreme Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) and claustrophobia, and these conditions may have triggered the Sheriff's decision to spring her from Lynwood Jail last week. We're told Hilton is taking Adderall for her ADD. Although our sources were not specific, we're told Hilton was not receiving all of her medications at Lynwood. As a result, Hilton was having severe panic attacks in jail. There were times she was so debilitated, she could not push the panic button in her cell." A panic button? Don't they have those in retirement centers? Right next to the toilet? I think I accidentally pulled the cord once visiting my grandma in her retirement center. Best part about that day was seeing the shampoo she used: Silver Fox. What I want to address that's on-topic though is the speed with which a celeb is diagnosed with a mental illness. Britney's in rehab? She must have bipolar disorder. Paris is in jail? Well, she's gotta be ADD. This tendency to over-diagnose seems to be a new excuse for wrongdoing or getting your shit together. Maybe they're just fucked up, they don't necessarily have to suffering from a mental illness to account for their behavior. And who doesn'tthink jail is claustrophobic? You're in a fucking 9x9 cell, of course it's close quarters.

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