Friday, February 16, 2007

From A Socialite's Life:

"Yep. The Cruise has gotten to them. FOX News is reporting that the couple is into Scientology more than ever . They have been taking professional business meetings at Scientology's Celebrity Center in Hollywood.
Anthony is said to have taken the "purification" course, a hopped-up sauna that supposedly "cures" all ills. Lopez may have invested in the IRS-sanctioned religion thanks to infertility issues and difficulties in the couple's marriage.

What's very clear is that Lopez and Anthony's sudden friendship with chief celebrity Scientologist Tom Cruise is no accident. Other than belonging to the expensive pay-as-you-go religion, Cruise and the Lopez-Anthonys would have nothing in common.

From what I'm told, Lopez and Anthony entered Scientology with the help of Angelo Pagan, the husband of "King of Queens" actress Leah Remini. Both Pagan and Remini -- mostly the former -- have taken dozens of pricey courses in L. Ron Hubbard's creation."

The only reason Marc Anthony is taking purification courses is because he's learning how to become human. So I visited my cousins in St. Louis last weekend and they live in an area with pretty ritzy houses. What's the point? There isn't one, but a few blocks from their apartment is...a church of Scientology! And they have an open house every weekend! I wanted to go and announce my income at the door to see if they would really allow me to become a member since I make a butthole salary and would never contribute to their creepy religion, and Scientology is made up of rich celebrities like Jenna Elfman who regularly donate. In fact, I think it's required. But. We never went to the open house. On that note, I'll continue making up freaky cultish stories about Scientology and never learn the facts.

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